CrackalakinTastic Hetalia Ad Libs!
by CrashTheMIGHTY
Summary: A collection of ad libs I filled out specifically for Hetalia
1. The Science Fair

**It's uncanny how fitting this one was O.o**

**I don't own Hetalia or this ad lib**

According to Principal **Arthur**, the school science fair this year was "very educational." At the same time, Principal **Arthur** announced plans to quit the school system and become a **Bobby**. "It sounds like a safer job," the Principal said.

Several **Snarky** projects were disqualified this year. The experiment on Animal Magnetism by **Feliks** was canceled before we could plug in her **Polish Pony**. The project by **Ivan** on Gravity's Effect on First Graders was canceled when the custodians wouldn't let him borrow a ladder. And the nuclear-powered **Gilbird** built by **Gilbert** was taken away by the police, who said **Antonio** will be back in school "any day now."

**Cassie** won second prize with an experiment that asked, Can **Unicorns** Learn Karate? (The answer was yes.) The **Unicorns** tossed Principal **Arthur** over a **tea** and left the science fair. Anyone who sees them should call the main office.

**Elizaveta** won first prize with her TNT **tomatoes**. By planting seeds in gunpowder and watering them with nitroglycerin, she grew **tomatoes** that explode when you drop them. "What a dynamite idea," the Principal joked **Awesomely**. So far, nobody has figured out how the prize-winning **tomatoes** got into the salad served to the Principal at lunchtime. Just to be safe, though, the Vegetable Surprise has been taken off tomorrow's lunch menu.


	2. Things That Drive Me Crazy

**I don't own Hetalia or this ad lib**

I just hate it when:

Mom serves **Wurst** for dinner.

My pet **Bull** chews my **Beard**.

**Kiku-sensei** gets mad at the class for being **Awesome**.

My best friend **Francis** decides to **Fuck** with somebody else.

I get **Screwed** for something I didn't do.

Dad makes me wear **Hungarys** to school.

My favorite TV show "**Axis Powers: Hetalia**" gets canceled because the station has to broadcast a news conference.

People **Run** into my bedroom without knocking.


	3. Strange But True

**I don't own Hetalia or this ad lib**

On average, people fear **Pierre** more than they do **Russia**!

Banging your **Pasta** against a wall uses **50** calories an hour.

**Arthur**'s son invented **Turtles**.

In every episode of **Axis Powers: Hetalia** there is a **Hair Curl** somewhere.

Many **Polish Ponies** only blink one eye at a time.

The **Finnish Boy** was invented by a **Strip Waiter**.

A/An **Gnome** can **Jump** for 3 years.

Women **Shit** nearly twice as much as men.

**Alfred F. Jones** comics were banned in **Germany** because he wears a **Cape**.

The average **Scone** has **12** **Rocks** in it.

**First of all, everything envolving the polish pony is friggin legit. No joke. And that first line; so not true...**


	4. Pet Show

**I don't own Hetalia or this ad lib**

One day my dad came home and said there was going to be a big pet show in our town. "That's **Dead**!" I said. "I'm sure **Gilbird** will win." **Gilbird** is our pet **Polish Pony**. She is really smart. She can do lots of tricks. She's very good at shaking **Ass** and jumping through **Tea Packets**. Her favorite food is **Hamburgers**. It's the only thing she'll eat.

On the day of the pet show, I got up early and washed **Gilbird** and tied her favorite **Thong** around her neck. She looked **Queer**.

I couldn't believe all the pets at the show. On one side of us there was a big **Turtle**. On the other side was a **Korean** poodle. At that point the judges came by. We showed them how **Gilbird** can balance a **Tube** on her **Lips**. The judges were very impressed.

At the end of the day, the first prize went to a big **Penguin** with **Pink** stripes. But **Gilbird** got a **Blue** ribbon for being the most **Awesome** **Polish Pony** at the show.

**This one is random. I don't really like it, but oh well! **


	5. My Favorite Town

**I don't own Hetalia or this ad lib**

Let me tell you about my favorite place. It is called **Feliks**ville. Everyone there always dresses in **Yellow**, and all the cars and the **Polish Ponies** are **Yellow**, too.

**The Nordics** came to do a concert in **Feliks**ville once, and the band liked it so much they never left. Now every **Friday** night, all the people who live in **Feliks**ville put on their **Shizzy**, **Yellow** **Skirts** and walk their **Polish Ponies** to the town square. Then they sit on the grass, listen to **The Nordics** play **German** music, and eat **Pockey**.

No one has to go to school in **Feliks**ville unless they want to. Of course, everybody wants to because** **Arthur Kirkland** **and** **Alfred F. Jones** **are two of the teachers.** **Arthur Kirkland** **teaches** **History** **and** **Alfred F. Jones** **teaches** **Art**.**

One day **Arthur Kirkland** said to **Alfred F. Jones**, "Maybe we should take the students on a field trip." "That's a **Awesome** idea, **Arthur Kirkland**," said **Alfred F. Jones**. "Let's take them to the most fun place we can think of." "But that would be **Feliks**ville," said **Arthur Kirkland**. "You're right!" **Alfred F. Jones** exclaimed. "Call off the field trip! We're already here!"


	6. Party On

**This one is for the Nordics! I don't own Hetalia or this ad lib**

When invited to a party at a **Puffin**'s house, you should always bring a **Hair Curl**. This will make you seem especially **Nordic**, and may even get you a **Giant Herd of White Fluffy Dogs**. Don't talk too **Stupidly**, and don't ever sit on the **Random Narwhal**. Don't dance too **Awesomely**, and don't **Swim** anything that's in the **Sexy Glasses **(LOL WTF?). At the end of the party, be sure to **Thank** your host before saying **SHIT!** and driving home.


	7. My Favorite Town II

**This one is for Japan! I don't own Hetalia or this ad lib**

Let me tell you about my favorite place. It is called **Kiku**ville. Everyone there always dresses in **Red**, and all the cars and the **Dragons** are **Red**, too.

**Onyanko Club** came to do a concert in **Kiku**ville once, and the band liked it so much they never left. Now every **Sunday** night, all the people who live in **Kiku**ville put on their **Quiet**, **Red** **Yukatas** and walk their **Dragons** to the town square. Then they sit on the grass, listen to **Onyanko Club** play **J-Pop** music, and eat **Pocky**.

No one has to go to school in **Kiku**ville unless they want to. Of course, everybody wants to because **Gackt** and **Masami Nagasawa** are two of the teachers. **Gackt** teaches **Math** and **Masami Nagasawa** teaches **Cosplaying**.

One day **Gackt** said to **Masami Nagasawa**, "Maybe we should take the students on a field trip." "That's a **Moe** idea, **Gackt**," said **Masami Nagasawa**. "Let's take them to the most fun place we can think of." "But that would be **Kiku**ville," said **Gackt**. "You're right!" **Masami Nagasawa** exclaimed. "Call off the field trip! We're already here!"


End file.
